While the rest of the world makes workout apparel for the ‘Barbies’, Constantly Varied Gear crafts gear for the Wonder Women with a sailor’s mouth.
For the chicks who #dgaf, we rounded up 23 of our favorite shirts to enhance your strong personality while you work on that physique.
Are you ready to offend?
For strutting around the gym like ‘I’m a boss lady fuck you’.
1.
Let’s get physical, physical.
2.
More mass, more badass.
3.
You’re #blessed, they’re not. You’re just trying to educate.
4.
Let your shirt tell your trainer what you’re too afraid to say.
5.
Squats are like sex. If it ain’t deep, it doesn’t count. Chalk up and get to work.
6.
But at least you enunciate them clearly and re-rack your weights.
7.
When you’re dealing with an ass to sass ratio, there’s a lot of work to be done.
Just offensive as fuck.
8.
Oh, so sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try a Shut-the-fucupcake.
9.
Most people are shallow, so this really isn’t too far off.
10.
There’s nothing better than being a beast and doing what others say you can’t.
11.
Not today, Satan. Not today.
12.
For the days that you don’t even feel like verbally acknowledging that fifth rep of burpees may actually kill you.
13.
… with gangster rap blasting, selling dope in your head. No time to be friendly. Let them know they need to keep moving.
14.
When all you want is acknowledgment for a job well done.
Knock down the male ego a peg or three. Or five.
15.
Him: “Hey girl, you’re looking a little weak in the knees *winks*.”
You: “Oh, yeah, that’s because yesterday was leg day. BYE.”
16.
Don’t cry over boys. Do some squats and make them wish they still had dat ass.
17.
When you have zero time and patience left for men who think your muscles are ‘manly’.
18.
Sometimes you gotta throw a dog a bone.
Ever offended someone with food? Now you can.
19.
Last time we checked, there’s no ‘Big Mac’ flavored protein shake.
20.
It’s not burrito body season so you may want to try a carrot.
21.
Don’t you wish you could put some people on mute?
22.
It’s hard to understand why people make insane suggestions like ‘go for a run’ or ‘eat some kale.’ Like, no Susan, fuck you.
23.
#Profuckingfanityisspecfuckingtacular
Bonus: For a head-to-toe zero fucks given look, shop these customer favorites.
- Start with an aggressive headband.
- No shirt, no problem. Your main girls can join the fun as well.
- Round out the look with badass leggings.
Constantly Varied Gear supports your right to offend. Stay badass by shopping these styles.
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